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Spring Troupe

Sakuya Sakuma - Gacha Rep
Veludo Station
Itaru: .001% probablilty? You kidding me?
Sakuya: ???
Sakuya: Um, are you playing a gacha?
Itaru: Yup. Can you pull for me?
Veludo Park
Itaru: I swear this game has a sensor that picks up exactly what you want...
Sakuya: What sensor...?
Sakuya: You know so many things I don't!
Itaru: You're better off not knowing any of this.
Veludo Library
Itaru: Can I ask you to do another 10 pull for me?
Sakuya: I just have to press a button, right? Sure!
Itaru: Hell yeah, just got an exclusive UR! You're my gacha patron saint, Sakuya.
Sakuya: Not sure what that means, but I'm happy for you!
Masumi Usui - No Fraternizing Policy
Veludo Station
Masumi: If she isn't here, what's the point. 
Itaru: How about imagining everyone here is her?
Itaru: Masumi, you ever heard of fan service?
Masumi: Nope.
Veludo Park
Itaru: You've got a nice face. You should really smile more.
Masumi: Why? I smile for the director, though.
Masumi: Why do you put up a front like that? Isn't it tiring?
Itaru: Haha. You'll figure it out when you're older.
Veludo Library
Masumi: I can't imagine you as a prince.
Itaru: Yeah, same.
Itaru: What? Maintenance again?! Screw this shit.
Masumi: I feel sorry for any girl who thinks you're a prince.
Tsuzuru Minagi - Give Me Your Phone
Veludo Station
Tsuzuru: Will you please put your phone away?
Itaru: Can I use it as a prop?
Tsuzuru: You really used it as a prop... Props to you, man...
Itaru: And I used up my stamina too ♪
Veludo Park
Itaru: Wanna try a gacha pull?
Tsuzuru: You won't get a rare card through me.
Itaru: Whoa, total trash pull. You're a real winner, Tsuzuru.
Tsuzuru: I don't even know what happened, but I'm annoyed.
Veludo Library
Itaru: Hang on- EXP x3 fever just started.
Tsuzuru: Yeah, yeah. Can we start?
Itaru: You look tired. Wanna talk about it?
Tsuzuru: Whose fault do you think it is?!
Citron - First Rate Interpreterting
Veludo Station
Citron: The ladies of the town said you were hot, Itaru. Would you like a fan?
Itaru: Not trying to brag, but hot means good-looking in this case.
Citron: But what does the temperature have to do with your looks?
Itaru: Because it makes you hot and bothered? ...You know what, let's stop there.
Veludo Park
Citron: Itaru, your stamina has recovered!
Itaru: For real? GJ, Citron.
Citron: I always strive to be full of hearty tips!
Itaru: Damn, this one's hard. ...Helpful tips?
Veludo Library
Citron: Break your legs, Itaru! I will be rooting for you!
Itaru: Yeah, that's 'break a leg'. You got a grudge against me?
Itaru: I'm going to try harder at speaking better!
Citron: I don't mind if you stay the same. It's pretty funny.
Chikage Utsuki - Elite Office Workers
Veludo Station
Itaru: You're having dinner with the guys from A Corp. tomorrow, right?
Chikage: Nope. I don't really gel with the sales rep there.
Itaru: It didn't sabotage your relationship? Teach me your ways.
Chikage: Sorry. Trade secret.
Veludo Park
Itaru: One of the girls in HR gave me something to give you.
Chikage: What a coincidence. One of the girls from Accounting gave me this for you.
Itaru: Looks like she got you chocolate. Too bad.
Chikage: And you got a ream of invoices and an energy drink. Good luck.
Veludo Library
Itaru: Play any online games? I saw a guild master with glasses just like yours.
Chikage: Can't say I know much about them. Don't you have a presentation tomorrow?
Itaru: Damn, forgot there's a guild event today. Hey, Chikage. We're buds, right?
Chikage: Since when have we been buds?

Summer Troupe

Tenma Sumeragi - Fanservice Pro
Veludo Station
Itaru: Winking's the best kind of fanservice!
Tenma: Seriously? If they roll their eyes it's your fault.
Itaru: You're terrible at winking, Tenma.
Tenma: ...I'll practice at home.
Veludo Park
Itaru: We should up our physical contact if we want to give fan service.
Tenma: Is that really fan service, though?
Tenma: Will they really be happy if we get more affectionate?
Itaru: ...Believe me, they will.
Veludo Library
Itaru: I thought of the ultimate fan service.
Tenma: The ultimate?
Tenma: You're terrifying...THAT'S considered fan service?
Itaru: Hey, what works, works. Feels greatbeing on top.
Yuki Rurikawa - Beguiling Looks
Veludo Station
Yuki: Your looks don't match your personality at all. It's fraud.
Itaru: You of all people have no room to talk.
Itaru: What was my nickname again?
Yuki: Elite Swindler. Totally perfect for you, right?
Veludo Park
Itaru: I bet you'd be super popular if you worked at a maid cafe.
Yuki: Are you trying to pick a fight with me?
Itaru: I'm sure you'd be in high demand within a certain subset of maid otaku...
Yuki: Be grateful to the parents you gave you that face, for real.
Veludo Library
Yuki: Seeing someone with a nice face but a crappy personality is the worst.
Itaru: Now you're just being mean.
Itaru: You can get away with anything if you look good. World's unfair that way.
Yuki: Sure, I'll give you that. Being cute's an asset.
Muku Sakisaka - Benchmark of Adulthood
Veludo Station
Muku: Itaru, you're like a prince! I wanna grow up to be just like you!
Itaru: A prince, huh? Too bad my castle's an office building.
Muku: Hmm...
Itaru: You're really staring. Or maybe scrutinizing is a better word...
Veludo Park
Muku: I saw your hairstyle in a manga. It looks just like a prince's!
Itaru: Nice. Time for my 2D debut.
Itaru: I'd rather ride on a dragon than a white horse though.
Muku: Whoa! An eleven prince!
Veludo Library
Muku: You look super cool today, Itaru!
Itaru: I didn't get a wink of sleep last night.
Itaru: I want a healer like you in my party.
Muku: Party? Sounds pretty grown up...
Misumi Ikaruga - Triangle Game Dev
Veludo Station
Misumi: Itaru! Do you have triangle a triangle game?
Itaru: A triangle game? Like, a puzzle game?
Itaru: A triangle puzzle game?! Lemme play!
Misumi: I'll look for one. Gimme a sec.
Veludo Park
Itaru: Couldn't really find a triangle game...
Misumi: Keep trying, keep trying, keep tri-tri-triangle-ing!
Misumi: Why don't we make a triangle game?
Itaru: Huh. Point.
Veludo Library
Itaru: What kind of triangle game do you want to play?
Misumi: Hmm, a game where you can make triangles out of triangles!
Itaru: Mm, you mean like a brain training game?
Misumi: Not brains. Triangles.
Kazunari Miyoshi - Social Media Masters
Veludo Station
Kazunari: Taruchi, my man! Your follower count exploded!
Itaru: I just uploaded a Let's Play of a new game.
Itaru: I'm craving ramen. Know any good places?
Kazunari: Hang on. I'll ask my followers.
Veludo Park
Kazunari: I got 1000 likes! Yaaaas!
Itaru: Grats.
Kazunari: Can I post a pic of us?
Itaru: Only if you put a sticker over my face. Gotta stay anonymous.
Veludo Library
Kazunari: Dude, how are you so viral?
Itaru: Well, I do have followers in the 5-figure range.
Kazunari: Whoa, I hit my data limit! Man...
Itaru: For real? Don't let it get to ya.
Kumon Hyodo - Dorks of All Ages
Veludo Station
Itaru: You think you're hiding it well, but I can see right through you, Kumon.
Kumon: W-what do you mean?!
Itaru: Tell me...where do your allegiences lie? Me? The 2nd Gate of Shadow.
Kumom: !!! I...I guard the 9th Gate of Flame...
Veludo Park
Kumon: P-please don't tell anyone I'm into this kind of stuff!
Itaru: This kind of stuff...you mean the fact that you're a total dork?
Itaru: Don't be ashamed, kid. We are the chosen ones. Be proud!
Kumon: It's kinda amazing to hear that from an actual adult!
Veludo Library
Kumon: I just thought of an amazing chant! I'll use it in our next street act!
Itaru: Really now? Then I'll have to think of one of my own, too.
Kumon: Those fantasy-inspired chants were really fun!
Itaru: Yeah. I'll invite Tsumugi next time so we can try with the three of us.

Autumn Troupe

Banri Settsu - Hardcore Gamers
Veludo Station
Banri: You're done with the guild event already? You're a monster.
Itaru: Think I'm the guild master for nothing?
Itaru: Hehe, need me to cover you?
Banri: I don't like your tone. I'll do it myself.
Veludo Park
Itaru: Oh crap, the event gacha started. BRB, buying more Crystals.
Banri: Good luck.
Itaru: Are you friggin' kidding me? Maintenance!? Screw this.
Banri: Bet it'll be 8 hours too.
Veludo Library
Itaru: I'm still pissed at you for taking one of my kills yesterday.
Banri: Man up, dude. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there.
Itaru: Make it up to me by backing me up in that limited quest later.
Banri: Sure. I've got some items I wanna power up.
Juza Hyodo - Out of a Fighting Game
Veludo Station
Itaru: ......
Juza: W-What?
Itaru: ↓↑〇△→↑←
Juza: !?
Veludo Park
Itaru: When I look at you I just get the impulse to press commands.
Juza: Commands...? Like in a game, or...?
Itaru: Okay, so when I say ↑→ you do a roundhouse kick, got it?
Juza: O-Okay?!
Veludo Library
Itaru: There was a chara like you in a fighting game I used to be obsessed with.
Juza: I've never played a fighting game.
Itaru: When I say →↑〇△↓↓ you let out a surge attack, all right?
Juza: That's literally impossible.
Taichi Nanao - F2P vs P2P
Veludo Station
Itaru: Really hoping this card comes home.
Taichi: Ooh! I'm gonna try pulling too!
Taichi: I got it! Saving all those crystals really paid off!
Itaru: ...Wanna fight, Taichi?
Veludo Park
Taichi: I've bought stuff before, y'know! I spent 300 yen once!
Itaru: You kiddin' me? Get on my level, bro.
Taichi: Your equipment is amazing! Are you using cheats?!
Itaru: Cheats? Nope, got it fair and square. P2W for life.
Veludo Library
Taichi: I wanna join your guild!
Itaru: You gotta be over level 300 first, noob.
Taichi: I'm doing the next event entirely F2P!
Itaru: You do that. I'll crush you.
Omi Fushimi - Midnight Snack Supplier
Veludo Station
Itaru: I'll have an order of ramen tonight.
Omi: Tonkotsu?
Itaru: A side of grilled onigiri too.
Omi: Haha. Roger that.
Veludo Park
Itaru: The onigiri I asked for last night is already gone.
Omi: Oh... I'm pretty sure the culprit is Misumi.
Itaru: Just make them round next time.
Omi: Ahh, I see. Got it.
Veludo Library
Omi: Don't you crave something light for dinner sometimes?
Itaru: The entire point of dinner is to load up on calories.
Omi: I recommend chicken broth ramen tonight.
Itaru: Sure. Let's go with that.
Sakyo Furuichi - Elite Adults
Veludo Station
Itaru: Is our troupe really that poor?
Sakyo: Wouldn't say poor, but things are tight.
Sakyo: Raising your data plan for some pixels? Give some of that cash to us.
Itaru: Yeah, no.
Veludo Park
Itaru: Want me to take a look at the account?
Sakyo: That would help a lot. Don't make any weird charges, though.
Itaru: Well, should we start playing the stock market?
Sakyo: We don't even have enough money to do that.
Veludo Library
Itaru: I know a bit about economics, so let me know if you have any questions.
Sakyo: All right. I'll let you know.
Itaru: Seriously, you interested in buying some stocks?
Sakyo: ...On a personal level? Yeah.
Azami Izumida - Fix Your Skin, and Your Life
Veludo Station
Azami: Hmm....
Itaru: I'll just...pretend you're not staring at me.
Azami: Your skin's not doing too good. 3 slaps should do the trick.
Itaru: Hang on, I'm pretty sure any slaps would do more damage.
Veludo Park
Azami: Starting from today, you're sleeping at 9PM. No late-night snacks either.
Itaru: Not today, Satan. Not today.
Itaru: Okay, I won't snack, but there's no way I'm sleeping at NINE...
Azami: Tch. You're just making my skin care routine for you harder.
Veludo Library
Itaru: I gave up my snacks for my skin care routine, just like you asked.
Azami: Hmm...your skin's improved. I'll give you a passing mark. Barely.
Itaru: Hell yeah. Time for pizza and soda all night long!
Azami: I will end you.

Winter Troupe

Tsumugi Tsukioka - Experienced Tutors
Veludo Station
Itaru: Do you tutor elementary kids?
Tsumugi: I used too, but now I mainly tutor high schoolers.
Tsumugi: Ah right, you tutored Sakuya before, didn't you?
Itaru: Just once. He was so attentive.
Veludo Park
Itaru: You seem like a nice teacher.
Tsumugi: Ahaha... I hope my students feel the same.
Tsumugi: I bet you'd make a good tutor, too.
Itaru: Think so? I guess it wasn't bad tutoring Sakuya.
Veludo Library
Tsumugi: I'm looking at all the students' homework. Feel like helping me out?
Itaru: I'm doing an event right now so I'll pass.
Tsumugi: I'm not great at science, so I'd really appreciate your help...
Itaru: Not only are you good at teaching, you're good at asking for favors...Fine.
Tasuku Takato - Pulls no Punches
Veludo Station
Itaru: Crap, it's EXP fever! Sorry, Tasuku. You're on your own.
Tasuku: You've gotta be kidding me!
Itaru: Nice, they've started a referral campaign. Can I send you an invite?
Tasuku: Whatever. I'll sign up for it but that's it.
Veludo Park
Itaru: You and Tsumugi go back, huh? I'm surprised you're not sick of each other.
Tasuku: We're like brothers. I'd never get sick of him.
Itaru: You're so huge, Tasuku. You're like a Giant Warrior of the Hidden Forest.
Tasuku: Stop comparing me to game characters...
Veludo Library
Tasuku: Do you want to play soccer... Ah, nevermind.
Itaru: Did you just snub me to my face?
Itaru: Had a teacher in high school who was a musclehead like you. Takes me back.
Tasuku: ...I bet you hid in the nurse's office during gym class.
Hisoka Mikage - Light Novel Protag?
Veludo Station
Itaru: You've seriously got amnesia?
Hisoka: Yeah.
Itaru: Dude, you're like the hero in a light novel...
Hisoka: Light novel...?
Veludo Park
Itaru: Just sayin', Hisoka Mikage sounds like the name of a light novel protag.
Hisoka: I don't really get it... I'm going to sleep.
Hisoka: Zzz...zzz...
Itaru: And if this were a game, you'd be a dark assassin.
Veludo Library
Itaru: Zzz...zzz...
Hisoka: When's your light novel adventure gonna start?
Itaru: Anyway, lmk when your memories come back.
Hisoka: Okay. ...You look like you're having fun.
Homare Arisugawa - Needs more Earplug
Veludo Station
Homare: Glider, glider, flying high! Holland's naan brings such delight!
Itaru: ......
Homare: I see that you're wearing earplugs, Itaru. Are you ready for bed?
Itaru: ......
Veludo Park
Homare: You forgot to take out your earplugs this morning! Here, let me do it.
Itaru: Your positivity frightens me.
Homare: Itaru, you're kind of scatterbrained, aren't you?
Itaru: Better than being an airhead and a weirdo.
Veludo Library
Homare: I bought earplugs, too! Hm? I can't hear you.
Itaru: There really is a fine line between genius and idiot...
Homare: I wrote a poem for you! Listen and be wowed! ♪
Itaru: Hang on, just gotta put in my earplugs.
Azuma Yukishiro - Frivolous Vistors
Veludo Station
Itaru: If we don't meet our quota, we're only allowed one side tonight.
Azuma: Is that what Sakyo said? Guess we just gotta do it.
Azuma: We just missed meeting our target. Oh well, we can always buy a side dish.
Itaru: That's a genius idea.
Veludo Park
Azuma: I feel my energy drop when it's too sunny outside...
Itaru: Plus it makes a glare on my phone screen.
Azuma: I'm exhausted... Let's have some tea.
Itaru: Sign me up.
Veludo Library
Azuma: Our skit today is supposed to be about anger.
Itaru: What a pain. Let's just do whatever.
Azuma: We're done! ♪
Itaru: Back to the event...
Guy - Morning Shower Crew
Veludo Station
Itaru: Never thought you'd be the type to take morning showers.
Guy: Mourning showers? I am afraid nothing to mourn when I bathe.
Itaru: Morning showers. You know like, taking a shower...in the morning.
Guy: I see that I misheard you before. I must take care when listening.
Veludo Park
Guy: I exercise in the morning, so I have to shower to rid myself of sweat.
Itaru: Right. You can fix your bed head while you're at it, so that's a plus, too.
Itaru: You always look so put together. You do your hair and everything, too.
Guy: An attendant's appearance is highly important. Bed head won't do.
Veludo Library
Guy: Am I imagining things, or has the shampoo been watered down...
Itaru: The water pressure in the shower is somewhat weak as well...
Guy: Could it be the work of a bathroom apparition?
Itaru: Nah. It's probably the work of a certain yakuza living in the dorm...

References